As of April 7, 2008, I was no longer employed at Caper Radio at CBU. Same goes for Brent (we
had a combined total of 14 years working/volunteering at the station). Over the years, we've
tried to make it our goal of doing pretty stupid things purely for our own amusement. Our last
day would prove to be no exception. Our last day was also the same day as the DJ Appreciation
Party. Our last day was also the last day of the stations (practically forced upon) mascot, Rock-
O-Dile Rex.
This is Rock-O-Dile Rex. He's an actual alligator (or at least he was at one point many years ago... now he's a
real dead alligator). Don't worry - we didn't kill him. He was left in the station by a former staff
member (before that I believe he lived in the biology department on campus). We tried getting
rid of him for the duration of his stay (3 years) but with no success. Seems no one wanted a big,
dead, constantly leaking saw-dust alligator at their home or business. So, we decided to make the
best of a bad situation by sticking a Caper Radio shirt on it and making it our mascot (after a
year). However, as you can see, the saw dust problem was insane, and he really did take up an
obscene amount of space in the CD library (it was the best place for him... some people feared
seeing him). So, he just had to go - one way or another.
So, Brent and I got the idea - why not just throw him away? He's gonna end up in the garbage
sooner or later, as I doubt any future staff of the radio station would allow such a thing to stay.
Once we decided upon that, we figured since it was going to end up in a dumpster anyways, we
might as well have some fun with it first. This is where the idea of 'gator-toss' came up.
The basic idea is very simple: Brent and I would go to the balcony of the SU, and toss the thing
into a controlled (by someone on the ground) landing site. He would then become further
destroyed, and then tossed in the garbage. Couldn't be simpler. It wasn't even an entirely new idea.
In the past we've tossed things such as pop bottles (to see which fell harder - diet or regular coke), and
a mummified jack-o-lantern. But, Rex was the biggest/potentially the most dangerous and messy.
However, on the way to the balcony (there was an army of 6 of us at this point) we were cut off
by the SU janitor who often got mad at us for the mess that often fell out of Rock-O-Dile Rex. If
he knew we were going to try and blow the thing up... well, I cant imagine his reaction would be
pleasant. So, we just had to stand in the hallway, looking casual about walking around with an
alligator and giggling.
Eventually, however, the coast was clear and off to the balcony we went. Brent and I got ready
for our launch (Brent at the head for aiming, and me at the tail for thrust/distance) and 3 DJs on
the ground, clearing the area/filming the event/just wanting to see it hit.
We had three possible scenarios on what we figured would happen when Rock-O-Dile Rex hit
the cobblestone ground. Either he would:
a) hit and break in half from the weight of his tail;
b) hit and remain perfectly in tact; or
c) hit and explode into a cloud of saw dust and disgusting old leather.
Myself - I was rooting for option 'c'.
See what happened yourself here by watching the actual launch from the ground!
Here we are, celebrating our victory, having vanquished our reptilian/wooden foe. Man, it was
messy. Cloud of saw dust everywhere. Nice thud too.
Yet, as you can see in the footage above, he DID remain almost entirely intact (his lower jaw was
pretty smashed, but otherwise he was fine... or at least as fine as he was pre-toss). He definitely
wouldn't fit in the nearest trash-bin. So, we needed to cut him down to size - wrasslin' style.
But, before that, Gary wanted to let everyone know that he was indeed a part of it. I enjoy that, in
the video, it looks as though me and Brent were actually aiming the thing at Gary. Which I swear
is not the case at all... yes.
Earlier on, we had decided we still wanted to have a mascot, just not one that took up so much
space, so we figured we'd just keep a piece of the gator - its head. That would be a fine trophy
for any hunter of already dead and stuffed animals. So, we did what any hoodlums would do,
and curb-stomped him.
The curb-stomping worked like a charm... sort of. It totally removed the head from the body in a
very tidy, direct way. The problem was that the head was attached to a weird wire-skeleton that
was holding the gator in his "I'm sort of hunting, but none of my feet can touch the ground" pose.
And this was some thick wire. Brad, one of our DJs, tried to pry it off from the inside out,
becoming for a short time the great Bond villain - Gator-Fist. Or, if you like, Megatron from
'Beasties.' Either way, he had a gator's head on his hand. Sweet.
It actually took the 5 of us (myself, Brent, Gary, Brad and Michael) the better part of an hour to
get the damn wire out. It was really thick, and stuck in there really, really well. Someone put a
lot of effort into taxidermying Rex's head, and then totally didn't care about the rest (hence his
duct-tape torso).
Eventually we did get it off, and were able to stuff the rest of his body in the nearby trash can.
True, a little bit was left sticking out, but we figured that gave Rex a suitable grave marker.
Afterall, that's the part that most people tripped on and would easily recognize should they wish
to pay their respects.
However, once we got him in there, we realized that we left his Caper Radio t-shirt on him, and
we kinda wanted to not let it well known that we put a mangled up alligator in a trash can
(though we did have an audience of about 10 smokers who watched almost the entire time we
were out there - the lesson: don't smoke). So, Brent dug in the trash can and got the shirt back -
fresh and ready to be sold! We were victorious!
Though, in many ways, Rex also won. Somehow, despite being dead for who knows how many
years, and being in pieces, he still managed to bite Brad and Brent. Brent got bit particularly bad,
and I can only assume he's gotten a terrible disease/ancient curse from it.
And now, this is all that remains in the station of our dear former mascot. Well, for now
anyways. Erin's going back to work there next year and won't go back in til we get rid of the
thing. Anybody want the top half of an alligator's head? Only slightly mangled?
RIP Rock-O-Dile Rex.
you shall be missed. sort of...
