**This article was originally written for the 60th Meridian (CBU’s quickly falling-to-pieces campus newspaper. However, due to length/content it had to be edited down a bit. However, since I have the final say here on thePS, I can put whatever I want up! Wee! Thus, I give you the original article in its unedited form! Enjoy!**
Halloween Fashions: CBU gets dressed up early this year
For the past several years dressing up for Halloween has been fairly passé in the eyes of many people. However, this year not only are the students of CBU getting into the spirit of the season, but getting into it early. In fact, some have been spotted wearing costumes as early as September! That is dedication.
It was decided to give these effort-filled people some much needed credit, so a group was assembled to find the most popular costumes around the school this year. Once the top 10 was found, those costumes were reviewed and critiqued by our select panel, consisting of Brent Martin, Erin Gillis, and Lady Fashington. Here are our findings:
#10. Peter Pan (the Irrelevant Belt)
The belt worn over an overly long t-shirt, and not at all on the pants. If it is worn with the pants, the pants cannot have belt loops, or a real need for a belt in the first place.
BM – This costume is a cute little number that reminds me of my childhood. I think it makes you appear young at heart and maybe able to fly.
EG – This costume isn’t very unique, but it’s still always a favorite. Put it on and you’re ready to fly to Neverland!
LF – All they do is make people look fat. Belts should be used for the purpose of keeping pants up.
#9. Fidel Castro (Castro hats)
The most popular head-wear, strait from communist countries.
BM – This is the scariest of all costumes. “I’m a Cuban dictator… boo!”
EG – High school history class taught me that Cuba has two things: sugarcane and missles. It only makes sense to trick-or-treat a Castro!
LF – They’re too small for the head, and at any moment it’s going to explode.
#8. Corey Hart (Sunglasses inside)
A variation on “sunglasses at night” is the equally pointless “sunglasses inside.”
BM – If you’re looking for a funny costume that people will recognize, this is definitely the wrong costume. People will laugh, but it will by a crying sorta laugh.
EG – I can only assume that Corey Hart is dead, so this costume is scary like a ghost! Plus the ladies will give you extra candy.
LF – Maybe if you’re blind or suffer from migraines, but sunglasses should be worn in outside environments.
#7. Half-Winter (Furry boots)
Furry winter boots worn all year round. Looks best with a mini-skirt.
BM – When people see you in this one, they’ll be all “are you could… a bit”? When I see you in this, I’ll be like “what a crappy costume.”
EG – One of the scariest monsters of all time: human above the waist, abominable snowman below! It’s terrifying!
LF – Wearing any kind of fur annoys me. It looks ridiculous You’re not a god damn Eskimo!
#6. I don’t know… (Shrugs)
Those sweaters that are only half-sweaters and then tie in the middle over the chest. Also known as the ‘boob-hammock.’
BM – What can you say about a cult classic like this one? Some people get it, some don’t. Either way it’s spooky. And supportive.
EG – Um… good luck with this costume.
LF – So many things wrong with this one. You pay $40 for ¼ of a shirt. Second, they don’t flatter anyone’s body. But hey, if you want to showcase your chest for everyone, this is the shirt for you.
#5. Kurt Cobain (Ripped jeans)
Jeans that are bought but look like you found them in a above-the-garage apartment in Seattle.
BM – This is one of those last minute costumes. Some people think you’re a hobo with this one.
EG – A slight variation on the ever-popular ‘hobo,’ the Kurt costume is a good choice. Especially if you’re one of those people crushes up their rockets and snorts them.
LF – These can be okay if they rip on their own and become ‘lounge jeans.’ It’s stupid to buy pre-ripped jeans.
#4. Rocky Horror Women (Underwear shirts)
A slip-type shirt worn on its own. Resembles/is underwear.
BM – Easily my favorite costume. What’s not to like with this one? Except maybe the lack of self-respect. But it’s Halloween. Wee!
EG – Some guys like to dress as the transvestites from Rocky Horror, or just plain hookers. Now girls can do it too by going out in nothing but their underwear!
LF – Makes you look dirty and you don’t wash your clothes. Looks like you’re passing your PJs off as clothes.
#3. Miami Vice (Blazer)
Pretty simple – blazers are back. Long live the 80s.
BM – This one should come with a plastic gun and a getaway boat. But it doesn’t.
EG – Combine the ‘blazer everyday’ look with the ‘cool guys wear pink’ look, and you’ve got it. This will also get you extra candy from people who were teen-girls in 1982.
LF – These are fine as long as they aren’t so short that they barely cover your boobs and don’t have shoulder pads.
#2. Lance Armstrong (Live-Strong bracelets)
Thousands of coloured bracelets to support things, but have lost almost all original significance.
BM – This costume is both terrifying and inspirational. Like the year I went as Terry Fox. It was hard as hell getting from house to house. I gave up around Ontario.
EG – When you’re Lance Armstrong for Halloween, you can be the fastest to hit every house on the block – seven times in a row! (yeah, I’m not going to make fun of cancer).
LF – When you wear 20 different colour rubber bracelets you look stupid. Just buy the bracelets, support the charity and throw it away. Or buy a World Vision child to feel better about yourself.
#1. The Fonz (Flipped-up collars)
The collar of a polo/dress-shirt flipped up, to show off… what's under your collar.
BM - Even is nobody gets this costume, you still look cool as hell. So punch a jukebox and dance!
EG – Heeeeeyyyyy!
LF – From what I see, this makes you automatically walk with a strut. They are just plain wrong and stupid.