An Interview with After School Special:

The interview with the lads of After School Special began down in the bathroom of St. Marks Hall (don't know why...). Jack had just finished urinating, and the questions began:

K - Hello, my name is Kevin Lionais, I'm the bass player for After School Special.

G - Hey, I'm Glenn Barrington. I play drums in After School Special.

J - I'm Jack MacIntosh, and I play guitar and sing in After School Special.

TPS - What do you think of the local music scene?

K - Diverse... it's really good actually, I think. It's supportive.

G - We have a good scene, like, people are open to different kinds of music, because, like, we don't have shows that are just like a punk show, or a hardcore show. They're just like shows with tons of different bands.

(at this point we realized that the bathroom we were in was the least acoustic place in the universe. It was debated whether to crawl into a small cubby-space for better sound. It was rejected.)

TPS - What is your favorite local band?

G - aww.. damn ... I like One Day Late and uh... Rudy Huxtable Project.

J - Slowcoaster..

G - Slowcoaster...

J - Slowcoaster, or Rudy Huxtable Project, are my 2 favorites.

K - Yeah... Rudy Huxtable Project... I also like Asscribed.

TPS - What is your favorite colour?

K- Blue.

G - Bum.

J - I don't have a favorite colour... I really don't.

TPS - If you could play a show with anyone, who would it be?

K - Piebald.

J - Sloan.

G - Umm...

J - .. or Superfriendz!

G -Well, besides you, I'd have to say, Satanic Surfers. ... you just notice the diversity of what we all like: Sloan; Piebald; Satanic Surfers.

TPS - And me.

G&J - And James.

K - Actually, we're playing with James tonight, so wishes came true!

J - Woo hoo!

(at this point, Jack began "adjusting" for which Glenn began to yell at him. Is this the end of After School Special? No, probably not. There was also a large discussion on the process of urination and the "last drip" theory. Quaint, no?)

TPS - What is your favorite kind of pudding?

G - Butterscotch.

J - Chocolate

K - Choc-o-late.

TPS - Very good Kevin. Very diverse on that one too.

G - They're teaming up on me... ya pricks. Conspiracy bastards!

TPS - What would help the local scene develop further?

K - If we had an album out. If there was somewhere to record, that was cheaper.

G - Somewhere that you could record that the person recording the bands would do it just for the whole purpose to get the music out.

(at this point, it was theorized that Jack was playing with his own "pee" on the floor, but it turned out to be water.)

TPS - what's the best ninja movie?

J - Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.

K - Rumble in the Bronx? I have no idea.

G - 3 Ninjas! With Tum-Tum, Rocky and Colt.

J - Oh, I saw that one. Ya know what? It sucked!

G - Last weekend, on Sunday, on the French channel, they played every 3 ninjas movie, so I watched them all in French. I was like, "Yeah! They're kickin' ass!"

TPS - Who would win in a fight: Kristen MacLean, with the ability to stop time, or Pope John Paul II?

G - I'd have to say Kristen, cause he could stop time, and like, kick some pope-ass!

K - Kristen. I think he likes pudding too.

(at this point, Glenn tried to sound intelligent, but to no avail. Jack yelled, and there was a big hub-bub.)

J - Kristen.

TPS - Okay, it's the Pope 20 years ago...

J - The Pope 20 years ago? Okay, he was in fresh fighting form then.

TPS - So, your bet?

J - The Pope 20 years ago, cause he was in Pope-fightin' form.

K - But... Kristen 20 years ago, would have been like 2.

TPS - No, no.. it's Kristen today, but the pope 20 years ago.

K - Oh! This is so confusing!

G- Okay wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. The pope 20 years ago, kickin' pope ass would still be a pansy, cause kickin' pope ass is frickin' easy!

TPS - Do you know how you become pope Glenn?

G - Yeah, doin' chicks. (much laughter ensues)

TPS - Okay, that's far better than my answer.

G - And making elaborate Play-Doh structures.

TPS - How did you guys get started?

J - Glenn tell the story. Glenn's the best at telling stories.

G - So, back in the old days, grade 9, we realized that there was a talent show at the end of the school year, so we were like, "Yo Jack... wanna play the talent show?" and he was like, "Boo-yah" (great impression of Jack, by the way). so, we played the talent show, and we sucked really hard, but, that's what we thought, but we kept playing. Then we got better. About 2 years later, took quite a long time, we started playing shows, and evolved our style, if we have one. Now we're here today, with Kevin using a plunger, trying to lift the floor up.

(at this point, Kevin really was playing with a plunger, sticking it to whatever he could. Then Glenn got a hold of it, and tried to attack Kevin with it.)

K - that's so disgusting Glenn. Don't touch me with that thing!

(more plunging ensued.)

TPS - So what's in the future for After School Special, or ASS?

K - Recording.

J - Recording. Putting out a demo.

G - A European tour, with Piebald, even though they broke up.

K - And... uh.. I think we're gonna sleep tonight, and eat tomorrow.

J - No, no, no... just demo.

G - Yeah. We wanna put out a demo. And we'll do that first, and however the outcome of our demo is, then we'll think about taking over the world.

TPS - So, in conclusion, does anyone have any words of wisdom, for any aspiring young people?

K - James needs to shave (and I did!)

G - Um.. despite my lack of... whatever.. I'll go forth and strike wrath towards people who hate us.

TPS - that's not really words of wisdom, so much as it's a threat.

G - No. Words of wisdom? Put a pinch of sage in your shoes and you'll have a sweet smelling scent all day long!

J - the After School Special motto.

K - No: we are one fine piece o ASS!

J - Please edit that.

We then exited the bathroom to find several people smoking by the door. They seemed quite surprised to see 4 guys and a small tape recorder come out of the bathroom. Oh well.