Fire Truck Santa
Fire truck Santas are an annual tradition. I have no idea how far this tradition spreads around the
world or anything, but I know around here if the place has a fire department, then they have a
day when Santa drives around on top of a fire truck. Usually he throws candy out to the children
of the neighborhood who often chase Santa until he does so. Every year I have to ask myself a
question about this tradition: what the hell is up with it?
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I mean, let’s look at the principle parts of this little event. Santa Claus is pretty evident. It’s
Christmas, Santa is a Christmas icon, there ya go. It could be Frosty the Snowman or Jesus up
on top of that fire truck, but Santa matches so nicely with the red fire truck. Candy makes sense.
There’s lots of different types of Christmas candy, kids like candy - why not put the candy in
baggies and throw it to kids? Makes sense. The big question mark falls around the other aspect
of this: Why fire trucks? Sure, fire trucks can make lots of noise and gain lots of attention -
they’re practically a mini-parade when they go by in normal conditions. But, typically fire
trucks indicate that something is wrong. Something/one is on fire and has only moments left, or
there’s a cat up a tree, or something. What of that says “let’s get kids outside!”? I can’t figure it
out. But I loves it anyways.
Why do I love it? Is it because Santa’s involved? Well, that’s part. Is it because it’s a
Christmas tradition? Well, I am big on those, but no - there’s a big reason I love this little idea.
Santa is up on top of a fire truck - that’s about 10 feet up right there. Usually he drives down the
middle of the street, to encompass the whole street - that adds about 10 more feet to the edge.
The kids usually stand in their front yards, which could add anywhere from 5 to 15 feet more to
the overall distance. In order for Santa to get the candy to the kids and cover that distance he has
to really friggin’ rifle them. Santa has a wicked arm too, because he always covers the distance.
It’s a great sight to see, watching Santa in all his glory, making as much noise as is both humanly
and mechanically possible, whiffing projectiles at small children. It’s almost surreal. On any
other day, this would be highly illegal, but at Christmas it’s not only accepted, it’s wished and
waited for. Weird.
Back in my Westmount days on a day with a fire truck Santa., I was outside with my friends
waiting for the jolly old elf to throw some candy to us. I got one - I caught it and everything.
My friend, however, was less fortunate. His missed and landed in the snow and appeared lost.
He started looking for it, and then lost all hope. He looked back up at fire truck Santa. Taking
pity on him, Santa threw him some more candy. However, since they were moving, he REALLY
had to chuck it to get it to him. As he released the candy, my friend spotted the previously lost
candy and bent down to pick it up. Now, since his last throw Santa had got his game back and
his aim was impeccable. As soon as my friend stood back up, he got nailed in the face with the
candy. Icy roads + that high speed collision = hilarity for James. I got a good laugh (and so did
Santa actually) and my friend got a double serving of candy.
This is just one reason why I love Christmas.